Insecurities

We all have one or two….or three or four. It doesn’t matter how many you have. What matters is that everyone has one. Even the most confident person you know has an insecurity. In fact, sometimes it is the people who seem to be the most confident who have the worst insecurities. For example, me. Those who know me always tell me I have nothing to be insecure because I’m tall and skinny and super friendly, blah blah blah. But the truth is I don’t always feel so great about that at times. I’m not gonna sit here and say that I think I’m fat, because I know I’m not, but I won’t lie to you and say that I feel confident with my body weight. There was a time when I was really skinny. I had a nice, flat belly but I was underweight. Now I am at a good weight for my height but because I am not the way I used to be, and my stomach isn’t as flat as I would like (or not flat at all to be exact), I am constantly putting myself down because “I am fat”. But I’m not fat, I know that. I could easily get rid of my problem by working out like a normal person would but…I’m too lazy for that. I want the easy way out. I want to be able to eat everything I want without having to worry about gaining weight and working out. So what do I do? I berate myself by thinking I’m fat. There was a time when I really wanted to be a model but then I gained a little bit too much weight for the industry’s liking and that dream went down the drain. But through that, I came to realize that I don’t have to be live my life according to what other people require of me. As long as I am healthy and happy, nothing else should matter. We are all different body types and that’s okay. In fact, that is necessary. Can you imagine how boring the world would be if we were all a size 2?! Not that I’m a size 2, far from it to be honest, but you get the idea (right?!) I know there are girls out there who probably won’t take what I’m saying seriously because they think I’m “skinny” so I can’t possibly know what they’re going through. And maybe you’re right. I’ve never been overweight so I don’t know what that’s like, but I do know what its like to feel like your body is not good enough. What I need to remind myself of everyday is that if I don’t accept myself the way I am, extra belly fat and all, how can I expect anyone to accept me just the way I am? Sure, I can just say I’m going to be forever alone anyways so it doesn’t matter if people don’t like me, but if I do that, will I ever be truly happy? Think about it. I should probably go do a few sit ups now, but the chances of that actually happening are very slim, haha! And that is my wrinkle of the day! Good night!!

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s